Saturday, November 29, 2008

Family Shrooms

The paternal side of my family has a mushroom recipe that has spanned generations and is a traditional addition to the Thanksgiving table. I don't know how to describe it other than this is what I imagine a pile of Smurf diarrhea must look (and smell) like. Since it is a family recipe I won't go into extreme details here but I will say that it involved peeling a shit load of mushrooms, throwing part of them in a pot with some wort of liquid and throwing the rest of them in a pan to (what looked like to me) sautee them. It's a mushroom base with a mushroom accent and a little bit of mushroom zest for added kick. So what the hell made my family think I would ever try it? Well, thanks to the wonder of the world wide web and this nifty new blog, i finally found the cahones to step up to the plate (pun intended). And here's how it went...

What I Don't Like:
Umm... mushrooms. Of any kind. I won't even try that hallucinogenic ones. (Not that they often find themselves in the same room as me anyway.)What I Do Like:
Salt, pepper, and water. If there are other ingredients in the recipe I don't think I even want to know about them. The mushrooms are bad enough, so as far as anything else that could be in there... well... ignorance is bliss.Who Made Me Try It:
That would be my parents. They've been trying to make me sample the family 'shrooms - among countless other things - for as long as I can remember, and I finally caved. I'll get them for this!The Results:
My dad will probably wet himself when he sees this in writing, but they weren't that bad. The taste was alright, bordering on nonexistent. It's that damn texture that got me again though. I felt like I was eating some type of seafood (don't be shocked that I don't like most seafoods) or something else that had gotten soggier than intended. I didn't throw up but I also didn't eat the second piece that mysteriously found its way to my plate. Baby steps here people!

Thursday, November 27, 2008

Nana's Apple Cake

Nana's Apple Cake Mix comes from Tastefully Simple and came to my parents' house as a Christmas gift from one of my mom's students I believe. It has honest to God apples (two whole cups of them) peeled and cut up into relatively small pieces. The apples are then mixed with the contents of the box and a couple other things I think... I didn't cook it... and baked for some predetermined amount. If you really want to know more about that, then check out the product details here. But that's not why we're here, so let's move on to the tasting details...

What I Don't Like:
Apples. More specifically, cooked apples. Give me an actual apple and I will take as many bites out of it as humanly possible. Put that apple in any source of heat and you might as well just throw it away before handing it to me. As is the case with most of my food issues, the texture of apple after it's been heated/cooked just doesn't sit well with me.
What I Do Like:
Bread-based desserts. I love me some pastries and cakes and whatnot. Give me anything like this that doesn't include fruit and I will probably eat more than my share. To clarify, I enjoy fruit flavors in desserts... just not actual fruit. The more processed the better.
Who Made Me Try It:
I'm home for Thanksgiving - the worst holiday EVER for picky eaters - and my mom prepared this treat for our holiday breakfast. She baked it the night before and I'd had a few drinks so she was able to convince me to try a piece. At first she handed me a chunk about the size of a golf ball and all she got in return was a blank "you've gotta be kidding me" stare. After tearing it in half and smartly handing me the smaller of the two pieces, I bravely shoved the whole piece of bready/appley "goodness" in my mouth.
The Results:
I survived! But I also haven't eaten any more. It wasn't terrible and I might consider having another bite at some point, but I think that is because the ratio was just right. The bread greatly outweighed the apple and the pieces of apple were small enough that I barely noticed they were there. It's important to note the key word there... "barely". They weren't in-your-face pieces but they definitely had a presence. The other flavors... I'm thinking cinnamon might have been involved... helped to distract me from the apple as well, so I have to give props to the proportions of ingredients in the recipe.